Whatshisface

The students speculate nonstop about what will happen if Brock can’t perform. The teachers are too anxious to teach, and the principal subs for Marchese, who is in the emergency room with Brock.

Cooper accompanies Jolie to get the BMX bikes, and Roddy implores Cooper to tell her how he knows all of Romeo’s lines. Cooper realizes that Roddy “attacked” Brock so he could be Romeo. He tells Roddy that he did an “awful thing,” but Roddy retorts that Brock will be fine. Thus, it’s not an “awful thing” it’s merely a “thing.” Hangings, beheadings, and torture: those are “awful things.”

Roddy and Cooper argue about the morality of Roddy’s actions until Jolie claims partial responsibility. She says that she should have gone slower, but is clearly more worried about the play than she is about Brock. Just then, Marchese drives by with Brock, who sounds like a cross between a cartoon character and a cheap kazoo.

Veronica thinks that Cooper played a role in Brock’s fall. Roddy continues to push Cooper to take over the role of Romeo. Cooper says that it’s up to the teachers. At school, Marchese consumes an entire pack of Tums before discussing the situation with the other teachers. One student jokes that they can do Romeo and Juliet without Romeo.

Roddy leaves the phone, knocking Cooper out of his chair. He returns to Cooper as Marchese announces the play’s cancellation—they’ll be the sole seventh-grade class not to perform Shakespeare. Using the speaker on Cooper’s phone, Roddy announces that “Coopervega” will be Romeo. Some students wonder who “Cooper Vega” is, but Aiden, remembering Cooper’s performance at the dance, seconds the idea. Marchese promises to let Cooper try the role during the night’s rehearsal.

On stage that night, Cooper stumbles over Romeo’s first line, but Roddy helps him, and Cooper grows more confident: he feels like he is Romeo. Jolie glows with approval, and Marchese is near tears of joy. No one says it, but everyone thinks Cooper is a better Romeo than Brock wa, and that his performance improves the play.

Cooper and Jolie walk home together during dinner break, and Cooper thinks about how he will be a famous seventh grader. He also thinks about Brock’s “accident” and how Roddy’s behavior qualifies as assault. At home, Cooper tapes the camera lens, and he and Roddy continue to argue about the morality of Roddy’s actions. Cooper takes out his earbud so the two can cool off.

On the way back from dinner break, Jolie and Cooper visit Brock. He has black eyes and a swollen face. He has trouble talking and he can’t chew. Jolie tells him Cooper is taking the part of Romeo, and Cooper jokes, “Wherefore art me.” Brock isn’t amused.

Veronica and Chad appear, and Veronica pulls Cooper aside and scolds him for stealing Brock’s part and his “girl.” Cooper says Jolie isn’t “anybody’s girl.” He didn’t steal Brock’s part—he’s just the only student who knows Romeo’s lines.

Though silencing Roddy is difficult, Cooper continues to go without earbuds and keep the tape over the GX-4000’s lens. Roddy is dangerous, and his inability to see the harm of his actions underscores his threat. Nevertheless, Cooper checks on him during rehearsal and sees his pleading, peevish expressions.

Cooper excels as Romeo, to the point where he realizes that he doesn’t need Roddy coaching him through the earbuds. Due to Cooper’s acting prowess, people at school, in town, and on the street greet Cooper. Cooper finally “belongs,” because he’s a “hero.”

Jolie compares the rush of acting to the thrill of extreme sports. Cooper agrees that acting gives him a rush. Jolie starts to say that the play wouldn’t be so amazing if Brock was still Romeo, but she stops herself. Cooper says Brock would have made an excellent Romeo. Jolie hugs him and calls him a “good person.”

At home, he wants to tell Roddy about what happened. Though he has friends and a possible girlfriend, he feels lonely. Despite having gone from Whatshisface to Romeo, but he is still unhappy. He needs Roddy: Roddy was with him before the metamorphosis.

After Cooper removes the tape from the camera, Roddy flies downstairs. His parents see the blob and think it’s a moth. His dad hands Cooper a magazine and tells him that, if he sees a huge moth, he should smash it. Cooper spots Roddy on the ceiling fan, shaking his fist. Cooper returns to his room, while Roddy goes back into Cooper’s phone.

Roddy feels betrayed. Cooper thinks that his century and Roddy’s century are incompatible. Roddy says he wishes that his father had never invented the phone. Cooper says that Alexander Graham Bell invented the phone. He disagrees that people forgot about Roddy’s dad, since no one knew about him in the first place.

Cooper wonders whether Roddy has to reclaim his reputation as the author of Romeo and Juliet. Roddy agrees and persuades Cooper to help him take the manuscript from the museum. Roddy says they’re the “perfect team,” but Cooper thinks what they’re doing is grand larceny.

Romeo and Juliet starts at 1 pm, but the cast has to be there at 11:30 am for costumes and makeup. By 9 am, Cooper and Roddy are in the science lab, where Roddy makes a mixture that can burn through locks; when police arrested his father, Roddy used this same mixture to free him from jail. Exiting the lab, Cooper spots Marchese. Absorbed by the upcoming play, however, Marchese does not see Cooper.

After toiling through a 45-minute bike ride, the duo arrives at Wolfson’s property. Cooper shows Roddy pictures of motion detectors, and Roddy flies out of the phone to scout the property for them. There are many cameras, but Roddy thinks that they can elude them. Cooper worries that if anything goes wrong, he’ll be the one who is arrested and put in juvenile detention, whereas this ghost will be left alone.

Cooper climbs the five-foot wall in front of Wolfson’s property. He notices a Rolls-Royce Corniche: the car that will take Wolfson to the play.

Roddy scouts the museum. There is a thick security guard with a mustache and keys. After he leaves, Roddy wants to go in, but Cooper tells him to wait. Cooper times the security guard’s rounds to gauge how long they have to steal the manuscript. They learn that it takes the guard 14 minutes and 11 seconds to make one round.

Because he has watched so many police shows, Cooper knows how to avoid triggering alarms. He opens the window using a toilet plunger and a small glass cutter. Roddy flies out of the phone and confirms that his manuscript is still in the room. Cooper pours the mixture into the lock, but the door won’t open. Maybe 21st-century locks are stronger than those from the 16th century? Suddenly, Cooper hears a deep voice asking if someone is there.

Cooper hides behind a display case, while Roddy leaves the GX-4000 and flies toward the guard. In a scary voice, Cooper says Roddy is Shakespeare’s ghost, and the guard faints. Roddy thinks that they should run, but Cooper grabs the guard’s keys and eventually opens the secret door.

The items in the room include Shakespeare’s tooth and, under a glass case, Roddy’s manuscript. Cooper lifts the glass, triggering an alarm. The pair runs. The guard, now awake, chases after them. Cooper drops some of the acid on the Rolls-Royce’s front tire. Then, they bike away. It is 11:52 am, so Cooper is already late. Roddy tells him to “chillax,” and reassures him that he just did something admirable.

Wolfson’s Rolls-Royce suddenly appears.