The Third Gilmore Girl: A Memoir

1. General Impressions

Gather initial thoughts and broad opinions about the book.

• Using only three words, summarize the impact The Third Gilmore Girl had on you as a reader.
• Summarize the key life lessons Kelly Bishop conveys in her memoir. What, if anything, did you find most inspirational about her story?
• Discuss what you liked most and least about The Third Gilmore Girl. Did the memoir meet your expectations?
• Bishop clarifies that while she craved a life of creative expression, she believed fame was “hardly worth the price of forfeiting your fun and your happiness” (201). Contrast The Third Gilmore Girl with the memoir of a high-profile celebrity such as Matthew Perry’s Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing or The Woman in Me by Britney Spears. How does the comparison highlight the pressures of stardom?

2. Personal Reflection and Connection

Encourage readers to connect the book’s themes and characters with their personal experiences.

• Bishop describes the profound impact on her when her mom asserted that, instead of being pretty, she would “be very different […] dramatic. And […] have a lot of flair” (31). Did a remark or incident during your own childhood have a similarly formative effect on you?
• The author details many challenging aspects of her life, including her emotionally abusive father, a series of disastrous romantic relationships, her decision to terminate an unplanned pregnancy, and her experience of grief and loss. Did any of these experiences particularly resonate with you? If so, why?
• As an actress, Bishop is known for playing formidable and sometimes unlikable characters such as Emily Gilmore. Did you have preconceptions about the author before reading the memoir? If so, were they challenged or confirmed in the course of the narrative?
• While the author is candid about past romantic relationships, she protects the identity of key figures by using pseudonyms such as “Kevin” and “Philip.” Were you frustrated by the author’s refusal to “kiss and tell,” or did you respect this decision?

3. Societal and Cultural Context

Examine the book’s relevance to societal issues, historical events, or cultural themes.

• The Third Gilmore Girl provides insight into the often-ruthless worlds of professional dancing and acting. What aspects of this behind-the-scenes glimpse into show business did you find most interesting?
• Discuss how the author challenges or subverts gendered societal expectations in her memoir. To what extent can she be considered a trailblazer for women’s rights?

4. Literary Analysis

Dive into the book’s structure, characters, themes, and symbolism.

• Bishop’s narrative begins in media res when she is almost 30, before doubling back to her childhood. Why does the author construct her life story in this way? How does it contribute to the reader’s experience?
• Discuss Bishop’s reasons for calling her memoir The Third Gilmore Girl. Why does she decide that this title is more meaningful than her original choice, At the Ballet? In your opinion, does the author merit the epithet of “The Third Gilmore Girl”?
• Discuss the role of Personal and Professional Resilience in Bishop’s life. Is this quality ultimately more important than talent and good fortune?
• Throughout her memoir, the author praises the talents of others and expresses gratitude for their support. Analyze the importance of artistic collaboration and friendship in Bishop’s life.

5. Creative Engagement

Encourage imaginative and creative connections to the book.

• Create a mood board that reflects the memoir’s key themes, tone, and message. Take turns explaining the images you have chosen and what they represent.
• Make a list of questions you would like to ask Bishop after reading her memoir.

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