The Night Diary

The family is low on water. Papa rushes Amil and tells him since he’s almost a man, he should carry Dadi’s jug. Amil does, and it is too much; he drops both jugs and most of the water spills. Amil looks helplessly at Papa, ready for his punishment. Papa shows restraint, pours some of his water into their jugs, and tells Amil not to spill again. Amil’s eyes well up, and he apologizes. Papa surprises Amil, telling him he knows he’s sorry and wipes Amil’s tears.

The family continues on their journey trying to conserve water. They find a mango orchard, rest in the shade, and gather fruit. Nisha wishes they could stay there. By the end of the day, they have covered 18 more miles, but they are low on water and running out of food. Papa assures Nisha and Amil that things will be okay once they cross the border.

Nisha shows increased signs of dehydration and exhaustion. She kneels next to Papa and in an unusual, albeit modest, display of affection, Papa places his hand on her shoulder and tells her they will find water. Papa examines Nisha and Amil and says Nisha has another day, but Amil does not. Papa gives Amil the last of his own water. Nisha observes Dadi and thinks she doesn’t deserve what she’s having to endure and should be resting in her favorite chair. Nisha becomes angry at all the leaders “like Jinnah and Nehru, who were supposed to know better, who were supposed to protect [them], who were supposed to make sure things like this didn’t happen” (127).

Everyone suffers from dehydration but Papa. He makes Nisha drink the last of her water. She takes a sip and hands it to Dadi, who refuses it, saying she has plenty of her own. Nisha knows Dadi is lying. A man passing by with his family tells Papa there is a village with running water an hour away.

Nisha can hardly write. She does so because if they die there, she wants someone to know what they’ve been through. They are still without water, and despite it being rainy season, there is no sign of any rain. Nisha asks Mama to send them rain.

As Nisha, Dadi, Amil, and Papa approach the village, they see a long line for water. There is activity at the front of the line, and Papa goes to it, telling the others to stay behind. Amil ignores Papa and follows him. Amil returns to tell Nisha and Dadi that the pump had run dry and one man cut another to steal his water. Papa cares for the injured man and saves his life. After he dresses the man’s wounds, Papa asks the man if they can each have a sip of his water, and the man looks at his own wife and baby and refuses. Nisha is enraged, feeling they deserve the water because, without Papa’s help, the man might have bled to death. Nisha is screaming on the inside for Papa to take the water, but she stays silent.

After the incident in the village, the family is too weak to walk, so they lay in the shade beneath some trees. Amil is in especially bad shape, and for the first time, Nisha fears losing him. Papa tells them there is a village one mile away, but Amil will not be able to walk, so Papa goes to get water. He examines Amil and instructs Dadi to keep talking and trying to get him to eat little bits of mango.

Nisha monitors Amil’s breathing and tries to wake him, but she can’t. Dadi panics, wailing out prayers to the sky. Nisha looks to the sky, and a raindrop hits her on the scalp. The rain continues, and Dadi is surprised to see Nisha pull the mortar and pestle from her bag, which Nisha uses to collect water. Nisha tries to give Amil water, but she cannot rouse him, so she puts water in his mouth, and he coughs. Papa returns.

Papa gives Amil water, and he regains awareness, asking Papa, “Are we dead?” (146). Papa realizes it’s a joke, and they share in a moment of levity. The rain continues, and they seek shelter. They find a hut with three Muslim families crowded inside. Papa begs of the men, and eventually, one of them men nods at Papa, indicating it is okay to enter. Papa holds Amil closely on his lap in order to bring up his body temperature. The sun returns, and the Muslim families begin to leave. Papa and one of the Muslim men exchange a silent and respectful goodbye, and then, together with their families, they each continue their journeys in opposite directions. Nisha and her family join the others heading for the border. None of the people on the path speak. Before the sun sets, Papa finds a place to camp. Nisha is heartened to see her diary, Mama’s jewelry, and the mortar and pestle. Papa removes their food from a bag, and to everyone’s surprise, Nisha offers to prepare it. Papa smiles, and then Amil, Dadi, and Papa watch “[Nisha] in silence like [she] is performing magic” (152). She has the pot filled with lentils and rice, ready to boil, but they are unable to make a fire because all of the twigs are wet. Frustration builds within Nisha to the point she actually understands what it feels like to want to scream, something she has never done. They begin eating the soaking, uncooked rice and lentils when Papa finally starts a fire. Nisha cooks the meal, then they all sit in a close circle, Papa holding both of his children in his arms. Nisha is the happiest that she can ever remember being.

Nisha, Amil, Papa, and Dadi awaken to a sunny day and a breakfast of rice and lentils. They each have jugs filled with enough water for the rest of their journey. Papa says they will be at Rashid Uncle’s in one more day. Nisha considers that her mother would be 35 if she were alive and learns Rashid Uncle is Mama’s baby brother. She wonders if Mama’s childhood with Rashid was like her own with Amil.

Nisha thinks about Papa’s need for austerity; he didn’t “like to have too much of anything, food, furniture, people” (156). She also thinks of Sabeen and compares her own thin frame to that of her friend Sabeen, and her “rosy full cheeks and lips […] her mother, with her round belly and easy smile” (156). Nisha admits to being jealous of the time Sabeen was able to spend talking and laughing with her mother and hopes that someday she will be able “to walk and talk and laugh with a daughter of [her] own” (157).

Nisha relishes in Amil’s recovery. When she starts to tell Amil how sick he had been, he jokingly insults her and the two resume their sibling antics. Nisha appreciates “his eyes dancing around […] [and the] grin spreading across his face” (158). His sense of humor lets Nisha know he is going to be okay.

Nisha continues to write nightly in her diary. Papa doesn’t ask her about her writing, but he helps her by sharpening her pencils with his knife. In addition to speaking to her mother in her diary, Nisha converses with Mama in her head as she walks toward Rashid Uncle’s house. Nisha sees her mother as the guide who is leading her way, and she wonders if Rashid Uncle will be happy to see his sister’s family. Nisha questions if Rashid Uncle will dislike them because they are Hindu. Nisha asks if she can be both Muslim and Hindu, acknowledging that she doesn’t feel like either and wonders if that is bad. Nisha takes solace in Gandhiji’s belief that “we are everything anyway” (162) because that makes most sense to her.

Dadi is very weak and has stopped eating. Amil asks Papa if Dadi is sick and Papa says, “She’s old. This trip’s too hard for her” (162). Nisha is missing all the things about Dadi that she had once found annoying. The atmosphere is too quiet for Nisha, who “needs other voices. They fill [her] up” (163). She hears the Azan, or Muslim call to prayer, and reflects back on Kazi’s prayer ritual. She compares Kazi’s praying to Papa, who does not sing or pray, and says “all we have is the here and now” (163).

Nisha sees Muslim travelers heading the opposite direction. They hear the Azan, and “they all stop and pray, and the people on [their] path keep moving” (163). This time, when Nisha hears the Azan, she says a made-up prayer in her head, combining what she’d heard Kazi and Dadi say. She doesn’t tell anyone because she worries that mixing faiths might make people mad at her. She does it because someone has to pray for Dadi.

The night before the family reaches Rashid Uncle’s house, Papa gives Nisha and Amil pieces of kaju katli, a diamond-shaped candy made from sweetened, pressed cashews. Papa had been holding back the candy the whole time, which briefly angers Nisha until she eats it. The trip will take one additional day “because Dadi needs to go slow. Papa, Amil, and [Nisha] take turns helping her walk and she leans on [them], her papery arm resting across [their] shoulders. Her bones feeling no heavier than a bird’s” (165). Nisha has accepted the uncertainty of their future.

At dusk, the family arrives near where Rashid Uncle lives. When they get close, Papa tells Dadi and the children to hide in the bushes while he goes to Rashid Uncle’s and makes sure it is safe to be there. While they hide, Nisha and Amil hear rustling, and as they leave the bushes for a better hiding place, a man grabs Nisha. Putting a knife to her throat, he yells, “You killed my family […] My children, my wife. They’re gone […] You all killed them. They were only trying to get water and you killed them” (169). Amil denies the man’s accusations and offers him food and water. They all hear Papa coming, and Dadi begs the man to let Nisha go. The man is shaking and drops the knife. Nisha runs to Papa.

The man begs for Papa to end his suffering. He tells Papa that Hindus sliced his family’s throats in front of him, and that he escaped and wished he hadn’t. Nisha doesn’t know how he knows they’re Hindu, because on the trail they were all dirty; they all looked the same. Papa returns the knife to the man, puts his hand on the man’s shoulder, and quotes Gandhi. The man walks off, and Nisha and her family enter Rashid Uncle’s house. Nisha is overcome with emotion and passes out.