The Last Straw

Greg looks for ways to get a little extra sleep in the morning before school without getting in trouble. He digs out a plush bathrobe that his mom got for Christmas and wears it. He thinks back to his disappointment at Christmas when he received books and clothes rather than toys. Uncle Charlie gave him a laundry hoop designed to gamify tossing your laundry in the bin. Greg had to explain that his mom actually does all his laundry, which inspired Mom to make Greg do his own laundry from then on. Greg remains bitter about the Christmas presents and feels that his efforts to butter up his relatives amounted to nothing.

Greg and his best friend, Rowley, discover that the bus route has been “rezoned” and that they will have to walk the quarter mile to school. Greg resents when the kids on the new bus route make monkey noises out the window, just as Greg used to do to them. Greg predicts that his backpack will make him slouch like Roderick and the troublesome neighborhood teenager, Lenwood Heath, who was recently sent to military school. Greg worries that his dad will try to ship him off when he becomes a teenager.

Greg resents that his younger brother, Manny, gets special treatment. Manny often gets out of bed and watches TV with the family, meaning that Greg doesn’t get to watch what he likes. Greg remembers how when he was little, he was afraid of a picture of Shel Silverstein. Greg’s dad warned him that if he got out of bed, he might run into Silverstein in the hallway. Greg goes through the picture books that his parents read to Manny and decides that he should try writing a picture book himself. Greg writes and illustrates a story about a man named Mr. Shropsharp who thinks that polar bears are useless but changes his mind when a polar bear saves his life.

On Saturday, Greg can finally relax and watch TV. After Greg tries to use “the Force” to retrieve the remote, his dad forces him to get some exercise. Greg guesses that his dad wants him to exercise because his dad’s boss, Mr. Warren, has athletic sons. Greg remembers a story that another kid told at school about a man who learned to jump high by digging a hole deeper every day and jumping out of it. Greg imagines that learning to jump high will allow him to escape bullies. Greg’s mom stops him from digging, warning him that the yard is full of pipes and electrical lines. Greg decides to try digging the hole at Rowley’s house. He tries to avoid his off-putting classmate and neighbor, Fregley, who hangs out in his front yard. Greg convinces Rowley to dig the hole, but they discover that the ground is frozen solid. Greg gives Rowley an “extra-long turn” and goes inside while Rowley continues trying to dig (32).

Greg formulates a new plan to make a time capsule. Greg presses Rowley to put some of his Christmas presents in the time capsule, including one of his new video games. Greg throws in $3 of his own money, which finally convinces Rowley. Greg predicts that his money will be worth more in the future.

Greg’s week gets off to a bad start. He suspects that his dad took the bathrobe and gave it to Goodwill. Dad also took all of Manny’s binkies, causing Manny to “freak out.” Now, Manny has returned his attention to a gross, old blanket that he calls “Tingy.”

Greg asks his mom for a ride to school but worries that his classmates will mock him because of all the embarrassing bumper stickers on her car. Greg manages to escape embarrassment by telling his mom to drop him off behind the school. However, he forgets his backpack, and his mom brings it to him while wearing her gym clothes, which embarrasses Greg in front of Holly Hills, the girl he wants to impress. Greg thinks that his best chance is to impress Holly with his sense of humor. Greg recruits Rowley to be his comedy partner, performing the setup so that Greg can deliver the punchline.

Greg convinces Rowley to give him a piggyback ride all the way home by claiming that best friends do this kind of thing for each other. Greg decides that he needs to take a nap, his new favorite activity to do after school. Greg respects Rodrick’s ability to sleep through anything, including one time when furniture guys took his mattress away from under him.

Greg’s naps take a toll on his grades. Now, instead of doing his homework and then watching TV, he naps and then tries to do his homework while watching TV. Greg manipulates the margins to stretch a few words into a four-page paper and receives a zero on a quiz. At school, his teacher, Mrs. Craig, gets upset when her dictionary disappears. She takes away recess until someone admits to stealing the dictionary. Patty Farrell is left in charge as class monitor and takes her job seriously. Nobody comes forward.

Mrs. Craig keeps the class inside for three days. When Patty is out sick, Mrs. Craig puts Alex Aruda in charge as class monitor. Greg’s classmates are not afraid of their new monitor and misbehave as soon as the teacher leaves the room. Some bigger kids begin interrogating suspects to figure out who stole the dictionary. Several kids confess to the crime under duress, but their confessions prove false. Greg worries that he will be hassled next. He asks Alex to help crack the case. Greg and his friends pay Alex $5 in exchange for his help. Alex pulls the dictionary out of his bag, revealing that he took it to study for a spelling bee. Corey Lamb takes the dictionary back to the front desk just as Mrs. Craig returns. She thinks that Corey is the thief and punishes him.