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60 pages 2 hours read

Mikki Brammer

The Collected Regrets of Clover

Fiction | Novel | Adult | Published in 2023

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Chapter 45-EpilogueChapter Summaries & Analyses

Chapter 45 Summary

Clover reminisces about her ice-skating adventure in Central Park, imagining Una, one of her clients, skating beside her. While contemplating the thrill of experiencing something on behalf of others, she receives an unexpected call from Hugo, who found a stash of intimate letters between Claudia and his grandfather. Hugo suggests they meet in New York so that Clover can share the letters with Claudia, who may not have much time left. Over coffee, Clover and Hugo read the heartfelt letters from Hugo’s grandfather, revealing his love for Claudia. In one letter, which he did not send, Hugo’s grandfather expresses seeing Claudia in New York with her husband and deciding to leave her alone, as she seemed happy. Hugo and Clover ponder the missed opportunity of rekindling their relationship. Hugo feels sad and wishes his grandfather had fought for Claudia. In the end, Hugo urges Clover to tell Claudia about his grandfather’s enduring love for her.

Chapter 46 Summary

Clover arrives at Claudia’s townhouse and meets Sebastian’s eldest sister, Sarah, who informs her that Claudia has been asking for her. The family gathers, and a doctor reveals that Claudia has only a day or so left. Claudia pretends to sleep to avoid her family’s fussing and confides in Clover. Clover tells Claudia about Hugo, explaining that he moved to the United States to find her but decided not to intrude after seeing her happy with her husband. Claudia is initially happy to hear about Hugo but is saddened to learn he passed away a few months ago. Clover then reveals the letters Hugo wrote to Claudia, expressing his deep love for her. Claudia asks Clover to read the letters to her, and tears flow down her face as she listens.

Chapter 47 Summary

Clover spends several hours reading Hugo’s letters to Claudia. Claudia reminisces about the day that Hugo recalls in his letter and the choices she made in her life. She remembers that day—she had a fight with her husband about her wearing pants. She confesses that she wrote a letter to Hugo, telling him that they could not be together. However, she adds that if she had received another letter from Hugo, she could have left her husband for him. The conversation is emotional, and Claudia eventually falls asleep. When Sebastian arrives, he apologizes for his past behavior and praises Clover’s work. He then reveals that he has meanwhile started to date one of his ex-girlfriends, Jessie, again. Clover responds with relief rather than jealousy. Selma, one of Claudia’s caretakers, interrupts with news of Claudia’s deteriorating condition. The family gathers around Claudia as Sebastian plays Billie Holiday’s “I’ll Be Seeing You” on his cello to say goodbye when words fail.

Chapter 48 Summary

Clover reflects on Claudia’s passing and her role in helping people deal with death, acknowledging the significance of Claudia’s presence in her life. In Times Square, Clover finds solace in the hustle and bustle of life. Back home, she discovers the “REGRETS” notebook lying open, realizing that these books are not just records of her clients’ lives but also opportunities for change. She adds her own regrets to the notebook and experiences a sense of hope. Clover meets Sylvie and apologizes for her previous behavior. She learns that Sylvie is in a happy open relationship with Clover’s neighbors.

Chapter 49 Summary

Claudia’s funeral is packed, and Clover attends at her client’s request. She tries to keep a low profile, observes the service, and notices when Claudia’s wishes are followed and when there is a discrepancy between the wishes and the ceremony. The discrepancy is that the ceremony is too long and somber. After the service, Clover spots Hugo, who has come to pay his respects on behalf of his grandfather. They have a brief conversation and agree to meet up later.

Chapter 50 Summary

Clover and Hugo meet in Washington Square Park, enjoying a sunny day and discussing various topics. Clover opens up about missing her grandfather when he passed away while she was traveling in Cambodia. Hugo shares his own experience with the loss of his mother and his struggles with coping. They reflect on their experiences and discuss the idea of taking risks in life. Later, they visit Clover’s favorite bookstore, and Hugo recommends a book about Gertrude Bell. The two share personal stories, building a connection that feels both intimate and meaningful.

Chapter 51 Summary

Clover arrives at Leo’s apartment for their regular mahjong game but finds him in distress, clutching his chest. Leo insists on not calling an ambulance and asks Clover to stay with him. Clover realizes Leo is ready to pass away, similar to those she has seen in her work as a death doula. Despite Clover’s desperation, Leo peacefully embraces the end. With his last breath, he encourages Clover to take chances and live beautifully. Clover cries as Leo dies, and she promises to honor his wishes and let herself live.

Chapter 52 Summary

After Leo’s funeral, Clover and Sylvie walk home, reflecting on the heartfelt farewell. They discuss Leo’s secret battle with heart disease, his quiet planning for the end of his life, and his donation of his money and possessions to a charity in Harlem. Clover opens up about Sylvie’s previous advice to declutter her apartment, acknowledging that holding onto her grandfather’s belongings might be preventing her from moving forward. She asks for Sylvie’s help in sorting through the items, and Sylvie gladly agrees to assist Clover in this emotional process.

Chapter 53 Summary

Sylvie helps Clover in the arduous task of decluttering her apartment filled with her grandfather’s possessions. The process involves categorizing items and, with Sylvie’s firm guidance, deciding what to donate or throw away. Some things are easy to part with, while others evoke deep emotional connections with her grandpa. Gradually, the clutter diminishes, allowing more space and light into her apartment. As Clover flips through a book belonging to her grandpa, she discovers an old coaster with a message from Bessie, the bookstore owner, which raises questions about a possible romantic connection between her grandpa and the bookseller. This changes Clover’s perspective of her grandfather, seeing him as a man rather than just her caretaker.

Chapter 54 Summary

Clover visits the bookstore to drop off the last crate of books and engage in a casual conversation with Bessie. She subtly mentions finding an old coaster with a message from her grandpa. Bessie reveals that she and Clover’s grandpa were friends with benefits and that they enjoyed dancing together, something Clover had never known. Bessie shares that her grandfather was proud of Clover and the life she was building. Clover returns to her redecorated apartment and reflects on the changes in her life. Later, she receives a mysterious package containing a digital camera and perfume from Claudia, which inspires her to embrace a new adventure and make her loved ones proud.

Chapter 55 Summary

Clover prepares for her journey by saying goodbye to her friends and her apartment. She reflects on the lasting presence of loved ones through grief. With a suitcase in hand, she visits Sylvie, who is taking care of Clover’s pets while she is away. The two friends share a heartfelt hug before Clover’s departure. Hugo arrives to take Clover to the airport, where they discuss their lives and plan to meet in Corsica in three months. At the airport, Hugo gives Clover a thoughtful gift—a leather-bound notebook for her adventures. As she begins her trip, Clover feels a renewed sense of purpose and connection. The chapter ends with Clover and Hugo kissing, which she enjoys.

Epilogue Summary

Clover and Hugo stand on the cliffs of Bonifacio, Corsica, as they scatter Claudia’s ashes into the sea. Clover reflects on the impact Claudia and Hugo have had on her life, making her realize that the interconnectedness of people shapes their destinies. She is grateful for the presence of Hugo, who wouldn’t have existed had Claudia stayed with her Hugo. Clover embraces the mystery of life, finding beauty in the unknown and cherishing the present moment. With a renewed perspective, she heads back to New York to begin her photography studies, savoring the simple truth of existence.

Chapter 45-Epilogue Analysis

As Claudia’s health deteriorates, her desire for reconciliation and resolution highlight The Transformative Power of Confronting Regrets. The narrative focuses on Clover’s and Claudia’s longing to address regrets and seek closure, underscoring the urgency of expressing unspoken emotions while there is still time. The concluding chapters involve the discovery of intimate letters between Claudia and Hugo’s grandfather. These letters evoke lost love and the weight of unexpressed feelings, making the characters reflect on the paths they have chosen and the regrets they bear. The final letter that Hugo’s grandfather had not sent to Claudia symbolizes a possibility that was never given a chance. The narrative suggests that there are many such possibilities, which one cannot access in the absence of risk. Claudia’s confirmation that she would have, in fact, considered a life with Hugo’s grandfather had she received that last unsent letter proves the same point. The resolution of following one’s dream and not waiting passively for life to happen is one of the novel’s motifs.

Claudia’s funeral illustrates the importance of honoring an individual’s wishes as well as the disparities between these wishes and the actual ceremony. However, a funeral is also for the family of the deceased, and Claudia’s farewell strikes a good balance between how she envisioned it and the needs of her family.

The impermanence of life and the enduring influence of relationships take center stage in the chapters that follow Claudia’s farewell. The narrative explores the acceptance of death and the peacefulness that can be found in one’s final moments. Leo encourages Clover to embrace life and take chances, emphasizing the importance of living fully and beautifully even in the face of impending death. Leo rejects prolonging his life when confronted with his final moments. He considers that he is ready to die, as his affairs are in order, and he has lived a long and full life. Leo’s choice to embrace his death instead of calling the ambulance signifies that quality of life is, for some people, more important than simply staying alive.

As the story progresses, it focuses on healing and the possibility of letting go of the past, particularly as Clover is no longer using Death as Avoidance of Life. The process of decluttering Clover’s apartment symbolizes personal growth and renewal. Her effort to let go of her grandfather’s belongings marks a new era in her life, not only emotionally but also materially. By transforming her living space, Clover makes space for the new.

The details of the décor in the book are notable because Mikki Brammer writes for various interior design publications. Sylvie’s apartment, decorated in a minimalist Japanese style, is the complete opposite of Clover’s apartment, which looks like a cluttered exhibition of curiosities. However, as Clover changes the space, a sense of harmony emerges:

As the clutter diminished, the space grew bigger. Sunlight bounced off swaths of white wall long hidden by dusty objects and compendiums. Arboreal shadows danced on the hardwood floor, finally liberated from beneath the towers of bankers boxes (297).

Through Clover, the author notes the importance of allowing a space to breathe and express its natural textures. By holding onto too many objects, Clover was hiding its natural beauty. The living space, in which Clover spends much time, is of utmost importance for her character’s development. Clover’s life is marked by grief and emotional turmoil. When she decides to address some of her regrets and open up to life, she also invites new relationships and activities. Her relationship with Sebastian, although not romantically successful, introduces her to Claudia, who inspires her to have a more daring attitude toward life. Then, Claudia brings Hugo into Clover’s life, with whom she develops a romantic connection, as well as photography, which proves to be a lasting passion for Clover.

As Claudia’s ashes are scattered in Corsica, Clover reflects on the profound influence of Claudia and Hugo in her life, considering the idea that people are interconnected in ways that they do not understand. With a renewed perspective on life, Clover embraces the unknown with a sense of wonder and serenity, cherishing the beauty of existence.

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