Tears of a Tiger

“Is it my fault that Robbie is dead? I wasn’t drivin’. I wasn’t even drinkin’.”

Although it was Andy who drove the car when Robbie died, the fears and anxieties of the other passengers were not alleviated. B.J. is also grieving; he believes that he could have made different choices that would have saved Robbie.

“You can’t blame yourself forever, Andy. And if you had died instead of Rob, would you want him to be hurting like you are now?”

Coach Ripley reframes Andy’s grief and makes him face a different scenario. Instead of focusing on himself, the coach wants Andy to consider Robbie and how Robbie would feel in Andy’s shoes. By doing this, the coach provides a coping mechanism that Andy can use to heal.

“That’s right. You couldn’t. There are some things that are beyond our power to control.”

Through Coach Ripley’s interactions with Andy, Sharon M. Draper explores The Impact of Grief and Guilt. The coach supplies a second coping mechanism for Andy. Instead of focusing on what happened, he guides Andy to focus on what he did and that he did everything he could.

“They sat there, Rob’s mom holdin’ back tears, and my folks didn’t even bother to show up. I should be the one dead, not Rob.”

Draper continues to explore The Impact of Grief and Guilt. Andy feels more deserving of death than Robbie. According to Andy, Rob has much more going for him in life, so he “deserved” to live more than Andy does.

“Naw, man. I ain’t no killer. I never wanted to hurt nobody. But he’s just as dead. What difference does it make?”

This is the central focus of Andy’s internal conflict: He knows that he did not mean to kill Robbie, yet his intent does not change the outcome. Andy is conflicted between action versus intent.

“My parents are no help—they don’t even know there is a problem, let alone how to solve it.”

Andy experiences many conflicts throughout the novel; this quote emphasizes the conflict of man versus other. Andy feels isolated from his parents and in conflict with them because they do not attempt to understand him and his problems.

“My dad don’t talk. He lectures, he preaches, he yells. But we don’t ever just talk.”

Andy expresses another conflict of man versus other. He and his parents, particularly his dad, have differing world views and do not understand each other. This places them in conflict with each other regularly as they try to navigate situations in their own ways.

“Irving got an A, as usual, and Ching Lee got an A, as usual, and, oh my goodness, even Andy got an A this week. I must be slipping—my tests are getting too easy if even Andy can get an A on them, or maybe he cheated.”

The primary themes of the novel relate to grief and mental health, but Draper also explores racism in the school system. The teachers do not believe that Andy, a Black student, could do well without cheating while his peers of other races, particularly his white and Asian peers, can excel on their own merits.

“It’s dark where I am

And I cannot find the light.

There’s shadows all around me

And my heart is full of fright.”

Andy writes a poem for his English class that creates a metaphor—a comparison without using “like” or “as”—for depression. Darkness is a metaphor for his depression, and the light is his will to continue living. His heart, being full of fright, is overwhelmed by his depression; he feels as though he is losing his will to live.

“It made us want to break somethin’ or hurt somebody. We never did, but I can see how places get mobbed or looted if folks get mad enough.”

School is not the only place where Andy experiences racism. He tells Dr. Carrothers about a situation where shop clerks raised their guard when he and Robbie were in a store full of expensive items.

“It spoiled that one special moment of peace and it made me start thinkin’ ’bout all the pain in my life.”

Andy looks for moments of happiness to sustain him; he wants to avoid situations that remind him of Robbie. Christmas is one of those happy moments until Robbie’s mom calls. The two have contrasting approaches to grief—Rob’s mom wants to remember, while Andy wants to forget.

“Can you think of any other example where color is used as a metaphor to express an idea? Or where black is used as a positive and white is used as a negative?”

Andy’s English teacher reads the poem “Black on White,” which is filled with the black/white dichotomy. The class discussion emphasizes color symbolism, where white (associated with white people) is always the “good” color and black (associated with black people) is the “bad” color.

“It seems like bein’ dead is the only way I’ll ever feel alive again.”

Andy speaks paradoxically during this session with Dr. Carrothers. On the surface, it does not make sense that Andy can only feel alive by being dead, yet there is logic to it: He now lives solely to avoid remembering Robbie; if he dies, he won’t have to.

“I’m drowning again, only this time, Mom, I’m in an ocean.”

Andy speaks of a metaphorical ocean. His emotions are overwhelming him, and he feels as though he is adrift at sea. There is no “land” or end to his suffering in sight; he feels like his only option is to drown in his emotions.

“You’re right, Coach. I got a smile on my face and a bounce in my step. I’m gonna make it.”

This is an ironic statement because Andy will not, in fact, make it. Though neither he nor the reader knows it yet, depression and guilt will become too much for Andy and he will die by suicide. However, he pretends that he is doing well because that is what people expect to see.

“Yeah, I know. You’ve told me before. Be a man. Be strong. Put this ‘unfortunate incident’ behind you. Well, maybe I can’t do that.”

This quote shows the impact of toxic masculinity, where society instructs boys from an early age that they cannot feel their emotions and must power through any weaknesses. Here, Andy acknowledges that he is losing the fight; he tries and fails to be conventionally strong.

“When you were born, I wanted to give you something my father tried, but failed, to give me—a name to be proud of. I didn’t want you to have to shorten it or lighten it in any way.”

Draper suggests that names have significance, and that the name others use to refer to a character reflects an element of that character. Andy’s father wants him to have a strong name to be proud of—a name that will lead him to a better life. This is ironic, as Andy’s father becomes so focused on the name that he loses sight of the whole person his son is.

“Adults are always talkin’ ’bout bein’ there when you need them, but then when you decide you do, they be disappeared like dust.”

Andy uses a dismal, gloomy simile to convey his growing sense of isolation from the support system that is repeatedly failing to support him. By comparing people to dust being blown away in the wind, Andy conveys his frustration at people’s fickle nature; they may promise to be there for him, but in reality, they often change their minds on a whim.

“When I think about school, I feel like I’m tryin’ to take deep breaths, but the air is made of sand.”

Draper uses a metaphor, comparing Andy’s depression and feeling of being overwhelmed to “air […] made of sand.” Though the air is not literally made of sand, it conveys the feeling associated with not being able to draw in enough air to survive.

“My head is throbbin’. My mind is cloudy. My heart is bloody, and my soul is on ice.”

These short, rapid sentences reflect Andy’s deteriorating state of mind. He cannot put full thoughts together anymore and is losing control—not only of his thoughts, but of his whole life. The short, sharp, desperate syntax reflects his inner turmoil, and to convey the full extent of his psychological pain, the author relies on imagery that is almost visceral in nature.

“It’s not that I want to die—it’s just that I can’t stand the pain of livin’ anymore.”

This is the climax of the story, where the novel reaches peak tension. Here, The Impact of Grief and Guilt overcomes Andy’s will to live, and he takes his own life. In this scene, the author emphasizes the hidden pain that ruins young lives when a community is not adept at Recognizing a Mental Health Crisis and providing the person in question with adequate support.

“We had some people from your office when Robbie died, too. It didn’t do no good then neither. They’re still dead. And I’m afraid I’ll be next. I’m just plain scared.”

Andy’s friends call attention to the farcical nature of bringing in outsiders to handle mental health when it is too late. While grief counselors are important, Tyrone believes that making these services more readily available would have saved Andy’s life, thereby making this current measure of intervention entirely unnecessary. Ultimately, the author critiques the reactive, “too little, too late” approach that schools and other institutions often take when confronted with the effects of an individual’s unrecognized mental health crisis.

“Do you know that the courage it took at that moment—to actually blow yourself away—was more than enough courage to keep on living?”

Andy’s friends write letters that draw attention to his flaws in logic and their own connection to what he has done. Andy became so immersed in his guilt that he could see no other option but suicide, nor recognize the strength he had to continue living.