Oona Out of Order

“Given the chance, she could be a better guitarist than keyboardist, and she was as solid on vocals as Dale.”

Oona is so deeply in love with Dale that he appears perfect. This is the first clue that Oona is letting her emotions get in the way and allowing Dale to stifle her own talents and passions to serve his vision of what the band should be: She hasn’t yet learned the importance of Being True to Oneself.

“They engulfed and consumed each other, but wasn’t that love?”

Oona’s love for Dale is intense. It clouds her sense of self—words like “engulf” and “consume” suggest that it entirely eclipses it—and feeds a side of her that falls into obsession and addiction. Oona has an immature and unhealthy idea of love at the beginning of the book, and it is only after she learns to value herself and her talents that she can return to Dale and have a healthy relationship.

“You’re fifty-one on the outside, but on the inside, you still have the mind and memories of yourself at nineteen. So it’s like you’ve swapped bodies. Only with yourself. At a different age.”

The reader and Oona meet Kenzie for the first time as her assistant rather than as her son. He offers the first explanation of her time travel, making him a mentor-like figure.

“She gasped and revealed a tattoo: An hourglass with swirls of galaxies in place of sand, a ribbon across its base spelling out M.D.C.R.”

This is the first glimpse of Oona’s tattoo and a clue about the most important thing in her life: her son. The fact that the reader and Oona have no idea where it came from creates suspense, as Oona continually tries to understand its significance.

“She’s living her best life. That’s all she wants for you, too.”

This quote refers to Oona’s mother, Madeleine, and encapsulates one of the themes of the book. Madeleine constantly shows Oona how to live life well through both her words and actions. She is the fully actualized, healthy version of Oona.

“‘For what it’s worth, I’m here, too.’

Right then it wasn’t worth much, but it was better than nothing.”

This quote shows how self-absorbed Oona is early in the novel. She doesn’t stop to consider what is happening with Kenzie and misses the signs that he is important enough to be the person tattooed on her wrist.

“She recalled the weight of the leather armor Dale had given her, the armor of his embrace. Oona shook off the memory.”

Oona literally and symbolically shakes off Dale’s influence in this quote. When Dale’s armor is available, she judges her bandmate’s drug use and is afraid of being mugged, but in these chapters, she fearlessly goes into rough neighborhoods, does a wide range of drugs, and picks a fight with a man on the street. Instead of feeling vulnerable as she did with Dale, she comes out beat up but feeling powerful.

“And nothing I do this year will matter, because I know how it all turns out.”

Oona’s immature reaction to her time travel sets a destructive and hurtful trajectory for the chapter. By not considering that her actions have consequences for the people around her, she becomes estranged from her mother and puts her friend in danger when she picks a fight. It proves that Oona, while embracing the lesson of being present in the moment, has not learned the importance of showing Consideration for Others.

“And how you decide to have a good time is up to you, but you should know addiction runs in your bloodline.”

Madeleine’s wisdom in quotes like this causes Oona to think twice about events in her life. Not only does she reconsider her own addiction, but she also begins to process her father’s death and realize it was caused by his use of alcohol.

“What would it have been like, feeling a natural high with him rather than chasing an artificial high with her friends?”

One way or another, Oona is constantly chasing a high. In this chapter, it is drugs, but sometimes, as the quote implies, it is love, sex, or even her pursuit of her son. Finding a Healthy High—for example, allowing herself to fall in love with the guitar—is key to Oona fulfilling her destiny.

“‘Do you remember anything from last year?’ He pressed his lips together, wanting to say more, resisting.”

This is an example of how Montimore uses time travel to create irony. On first reading, the implication is that Edward is concerned for Oona’s well-being. However, a journey back in time reveals the insidious nature of this question to both the reader and Oona: Edward is making sure she doesn’t remember that he cheated on and stole from her.

“The curved gleaming bodies of the guitars immediately lured her, like mythological sirens. […] Dale put a hand on the small of her back to steer her away, his resolute palm saying, This is my dream, not your dream. And she shuffled along, too indifferent to think of any new dreams.”

This is a flashback to the moment in Oona’s youth where she first sees and recognizes her true calling. However, she is too immature and lacking in self-awareness to prioritize that calling above the desire for her relationship with Dale.

“But if he held you back from something you were so passionate about, maybe he was the one betraying you.”

Just as Madeleine’s comment about Oona’s father’s addiction made Oona reconsider her lifestyle, this brief mention of Dale’s true character helps Oona see him for who he really was without the bias of being in love. It is the catalyst for Oona allowing herself to begin her love affair with the guitar.

“‘It’s [music is] a kind of high.’

‘I know what you mean. Music is the best drug.’”

Peter and Oona discuss what music feels like, and their choice of metaphor underscores that Oona has found a good alternative to the other addictions in her life. It is a “high” she can fully engage with in a healthy, affirming way.

“All good things end, always. The trick is to enjoy them while they last. […] Stop micromanaging your life and just live it.”

This quote comes from a later, wiser Oona who has finished her journey to maturity and who is trying to teach a less mature Oona how to live her best life. After some leaps, Oona doesn’t receive a letter at all, suggesting that Oona may eventually stop writing herself letters to allow herself to fully experience the year’s ups and downs.

“Sex became a drug for Oona, a pheromone IV dripping a steady dose into her bloodstream.”

Edward is bad for Oona for many reasons, but this quote likens their physical relationship to an addiction that affects her judgment, causing her to miss potential warning signs.

“I had a bad falling-out with one of my moms. I never had a chance to tell her how much she hurt me, and I know it’s time to forgive her and let it go, but I can’t. I’m sad and I miss her, but I still need more time to be mad at her.”

This is another example of time travel irony. Oona believes Kenzie is talking about his adoptive mothers, but further leaps reveal he is talking about Oona. The scene is important because it is the first time he interacts with her as an adult, and it shows him struggling to come to terms with her behavior. It also reveals his strength and compassion, as he exercises restraint and understanding in an extraordinary situation.

“So she said yes, yes, yes and sometimes she wished she hadn’t but mostly she was glad she did.”

Oona has started to embrace the lessons that Madeleine and older versions of herself have been showing her: to enjoy the moment. Saying “yes” to what is happening opens her up to potentially joyful experiences and shows how far she has come from the fearful version of herself in the first chapter.

“You learned one of the hardest lessons about being a mother early on: you have to put your children first. Your own happiness is less important.”

Madeleine tries to impress upon Oona one of the important themes and lessons of the book: the need for selflessness in The Relationship Between Mothers and Children. Oona is not ready to hear it and acts in a way that she thinks will satisfy her—anonymously working her way into Kenzie’s life—but instead hurts everyone involved.

“But playing fast and loose with my destiny is one thing. Now you need to take your son into consideration. His future is bound up with yours, so tread lightly for his sake.”

A later version of Oona tries to warn herself to think of others, but Oona has yet to see the consequences of her actions and so doesn’t understand or listen to her own warning. Her wording emphasizes that Oona’s life continues to intersect with and impact those around her; though the very idea of a time traveler having a “future” might seem strange, Oona does, and her son’s future is a part of it.

“It’s not like I ever pay attention. I end up doing what I want, anyway. But the way I hurt Kenzie tonight, I—I never want to hurt anyone like that again. Especially not my son.”

It’s too late to spare Kenzie’s and his mothers’ feelings, but this is the turning point where Oona finally learns her lesson: She needs to stop doing whatever she wants because her actions have consequences.

“I saw motherhood as something that might hamper my life. Instead, motherhood completed it.”

At the end of Madeleine’s life, Madeleine helps Oona understand how important she is to her, once again passing on wisdom about how to live a good life. Throughout the book, Madeleine goes above and beyond to help her daughter even when it is difficult, and here she explains why she was willing to sacrifice so much for Oona.

“I’m going to play the guitar no matter what, and I’d like to stay in the band, but I never want to touch that Yamaha again.”

Oona is finally back with Dale at the party where her time traveling began. However, the parallel setting emphasizes Oona’s character growth: She is now her true, fulfilled self and can approach the situation without being blinded by her love for Dale. This version of Oona knows what she needs to make her happy and won’t compromise on something so important.