How Not to Drown in a Glass of Water

Cara’s son Fernando is a ghost-like figure throughout the novel, for Cara is haunted by her memories of their fraught interactions, and this unprocessed regret influences her character development. Significantly, Cara’s characterization of Fernando shifts as her attitudes toward herself as a mother and her role in their estrangement change. Throughout Cara’s unreliable narration, Cruz relies on contrast to characterize both Cara and her son, highlighting the conflict between them. Whereas Cara characterizes herself as a strong, hard survivor, she often uses the word “soft” when describing Fernando. Although “soft” means many things for Cara, it always conveys her disappointment that he lacks the kind of masculinity that Cara’s cultural upbringing has taught her to expect. When Cara calls him soft, she sometimes refers to the Americanized attitudes that she believes make him more easily traumatized and that convey their differences as first- and second-generation immigrants. As an American, he is less afraid to cry in public, which is considered weakness in the Dominican Republic. Also, when he faces bullies, he does not fight to defend himself. When she confronts him, she implies that he is not manly if he will not fight back. Finally, she uses the word “soft” to convey that Fernando is gay and is therefore destined for a life of hardship and pain. The word thus conveys her fundamental disapproval of him and illustrates the social pressures Fernando has faced as a gay Dominican man.

Early in the narrative, Cara focuses on Fernando’s flaws, accusing him of being petulant and ungrateful because he was willing to report her to a teacher for an accident in which she chased him and he injured his head trying to leave the apartment with some boys that Cara did not trust. Fernando is closer to his aunt Ángela than to his mother. Ángela later reveals that Fernando has internalized Cara’s disapproval and feels that he cannot relax around her. To get away from Cara’s disapproval and violent outbursts and to escape his inability to relax, Fernando runs away, but Cara initially uses the word “abandon” to imply that she is the victim and that he is ungrateful for her many sacrifices on his behalf.

As her heart changes and she learns to see people differently, Cara reveals more positive traits about Fernando. He is a quick learner, an amiable person, and a hard worker, although she credits her upbringing for his successes. It is not until Cara recognizes fear in the eyes of her adolescent neighbor, Sabrina, when Cara catches her kissing her girlfriend that Cara finally realizes how deeply she neglected Fernando’s emotional needs. When she describes how he stands up to his father, Ricardo, she admits that he is brave and honorable, and she regrets allowing her mother to heap judgmental abuse on him without defending him. As Cara lets go of her perfectionistic need to be a good mother, she realizes that she must change. Fernando’s Mother’s Day gift and message to her at the end of the novel hint at a possible reunion and show that both characters have grown since their past conflicts and have the capacity to make amends.

Cara and her sister Ángela are foils despite their shared upbringing with an abusive mother who provided for them materially but traumatized them and neglected their emotional needs. Cruz contrasts the two women in order to explore The Complexities of Immigrant Identities and to show the differences in how children of the same household deal with trauma. Whereas Cara is a strong, hard Capricorn who is driven by familial and community responsibility and the relentless pursuit of her goals, Ángela is a fiery Aries—passionate, ambitious, and bold, but also emotional and demanding. Ángela prefers to talk openly about the trauma of her upbringing in order to heal, while Cara considers such an approach to be disrespectful to their mother and ultimately pointless, as they cannot change their past. Cara prefers to remain in the present while Ángela dwells on the past and makes plans for the future. Cara also likes the community in Washington Heights, while Ángela hopes to buy a house on Long Island instead. Additionally, Cara relies on the more authoritarian Dominican style of parenting that includes corporal punishment when warranted, but Ángela adopts American styles that use behavior redirection and emotional validation. These contrasts help undermine the narratives that reduce immigrant identities to a singular experience, and Cruz also uses the relationship between the two sisters to demonstrate the ways in which age, birth order, and experiences impact attitudes toward cultural assimilation.

Cara’s long-standing resentment of Ángela drives her character arc and leads to the major conflict that forces her to address her flaws and change. The narrative reveals that the resentment between the sisters first began when 13-year-old Ángela received a beating for letting Cara and baby Fernando into their mother’s house to hide from Cara’s abusive husband, Ricardo. Because Cara did not intervene to protect Ángela, she believes that fiery Ángela now holds a grudge. This guilt contributes to Cara’s overbearing caretaking of Ángela and her family in New York. Whenever Cara speaks of Ángela, it is to show their differences and to pass judgment on Ángela. Unable to vent about their differences, Cara internally resents Ángela because Ángela threatens her self-image as a good mother. Although Cara admits that Ángela is smart to save her money and acknowledges that she worked hard to earn her degree, Cara also resents Ángela for not verbally acknowledging the fact that Cara’s unpaid labor enabled her to get ahead. Cara’s resentment for Ángela manifests overtly in her critique of Ángela’s ability to mother her own children. However, both sisters desire to parent differently than their abusive mother. Because of their past, Ángela cannot abide Cara’s choice to yell and threaten her son, Julio, and she forbids Cara from continuing as their caretaker. When Cara forces Ángela to confront her, she must let go of her own Capricorn stubbornness and try things Ángela’s way. Upon airing their unvoiced grievances, both sisters realize that they are not as different as they thought; they both feel responsible for each other but show their emotions in different ways. It is Ángela’s loud opposition to Cara’s unintentional harms that forces Cara to change her ways and “find a different way to love” (159).

If Ángela is Cara’s foil, then Lulú is her mirror. As a supporting character, Lulú is Cara’s best friend. She grounds Cara and reminds her to check her own flaws and be the better person. Together, the two support one another, naturally stepping in when needed. Because Lulú is a Leo with an Aries rising, Cara describes her as prideful. Lulú wears the falda, or corset, to preserve her hourglass shape even at home. She makes grand announcements about her children’s successes and twists Cara’s gestures of support around to make it seem as though Lulú were the one doing the favor by accepting Cara’s help. Still, Lulú is always there for Cara; she lets Cara desahogar when Fernando leaves, forces her to maintain a routine when the factory closes, and shares wine, telenovela, and lobby security feed sessions with Cara in the evenings.

Lulú’s slide out of her coffee routine and into dishevelment marks her need and serves as a warning for Cara and others not to wrap their identities so tightly with external measures of success. Adonis’s job loss and debts embarrass Lulú because she feels responsible for his faults. Missing coffee with Cara is the first sign that she is facing an identity crisis and needs Cara’s support. As Adonis’s situation worsens and he and his family must move in with Lulú, she tosses her falda out the window and stops using make-up. Like Cara, she struggles to identify as a good mother and a contributing member of society. Without her pride in her son’s successes and without a job, Lulú has an identity crisis, and her visible deterioration exemplifies the idea that those who use external markers to gauge success may very well drown in a glass of water. Cara recognizes her own mistakes by relating to Lulú, and Lulú remains Cara’s supporter, encouraging her to make changes and to apologize to Ángela. Their shared make-over by Alexis the Pisces at the end marks the beginning of their new identities.