Homeless Bird

Although the tradition of arranged marriages in India rose to prominence as early as 500 BCE, it still accounts for most marriages there. As an institution, arranged marriage has withstood centuries of social change and modernization. According to an article from Emory University (“Arranged Marriages, Matchmakers, and Dowries in India.” Postcolonial Studies, 20 June 2014), the practice was originally used in upper caste families as a way to unite them. Eventually, the custom spread to lower castes. The article lays out six specific functions of arranged marriages. They include giving parents and other elders control over family members, strengthening kinship groups, and consolidating or extending family property. A central premise of this tradition is that it doesn’t approach marriage as a union between two individuals but as an alliance between two families.

India’s Child Marriage Restraint Act of 1929-1978 set the legal age for marriage as 18 for women and 21 for men. However, many arranged marriages still take place in which couples are much younger. A marriage that isn’t consummated before the legal age can’t be voided under Hindu religious laws. It isn’t uncommon for a couple to wait at least three years after their wedding ceremony before consummating their marriage. A woman who enters an arranged marriage within the Hindu tradition moves into her husband’s family home. She’s put under the charge of her husband’s mother, who teaches her how their household is maintained. The bride may be forbidden from interacting with any males in the household until the marriage is consummated because it would be seen as defiling her purity.

Homeless Bird emphasizes Koly’s dowry as the main reason Hari’s family sought the marriage. Hari is dying from tuberculosis, and his parents need money for medical and spiritual treatments that might save his life. A marriage dowry is their only way to get it. Dowries in India evolved from a tradition of gift-giving in upper-caste marriages. By the medieval period, dowries had become an expectation and even a precursor for the marriage to take place. The dowry custom developed into a social system by which families increase their social and economic status through marriage. Many families incur significant financial hardship to provide dowries, and women whose families can’t afford dowries are denied the opportunity to marry. Because of the custom’s negative outcomes, India passed the Dowry Prohibition Act in 1961. However, this prohibition has a significant loophole: It excludes anything given at the time of the marriage, including cash, clothing, and other goods, because they’re considered wedding gifts.

In more urbanized parts of India, the view only two types of marriage exist—arranged marriage versus marriage for love—is increasingly considered a false dichotomy. To support marriages that fall somewhere on the spectrum between the two, healthier practices have emerged, such as those in which families help choose partners but the prospective spouses decide whether to go through with the marriage.