Hate List

Chapter 5 starts with a news article about Morris Kline, reaffirming the wonderful things Valerie says about him in the previous chapter and including an anecdote from a student about how Kline stops one day to help her and her mother fix a flat tire by the side of the road, even though he is dressed for a formal event. His selfless nature contrasts with a quote from his wife, her words marked with grief and expressing satisfaction over Nick’s death. Kline’s wife feels robbed, on her own behalf and on behalf of her three children.

The present timeline picks up with Valerie’s relief as she folds into her mother’s car at the end of her first day back at school. She is sure she “took [her] first real breath of the day” once safe in the vehicle (107). At first, awkward silence dominates the car ride. Valerie notices the deep worry lines on her mother’s face. She brings up what she heard from Stacey, and she and her mother share a hearty laugh about the woman. As they laugh, Valerie notes how long it has been since she laughed, saying, “Laughter felt weird in my mouth. It almost had a taste to it” (109).

Later, in her room, Valerie reflects on the reasons why people act the way they do. She figures her parents stay together because of the shooting, for reasons of reputation and finances, and, for the first time, Valerie feels guilty about her part in that as well. She begins to clear out the mounting trash from the summer from her room and then tries tobetter understand another old enemy, Mrs. Tennille: “She looked so sad. Wasn’t it funny that not all that long ago I would’ve said I’d wanted Tennille to feel sad?” (114). She imagines how Mrs. Tennille might deal with her guilt and grief, imagining her gaining comfort from her child, then from a bottle of vodka. Valerie makes a drawing of Tennille, in her sadness, one hand clutching the child, the other clutching the bottle.