Flush

The following morning, Abbey explains that she took the video camera from the yard and staked out the Coral Queen, hoping to catch the vessel in the act of dumping waste into the bay. Even though she succeeds, the video footage is so grainy that it proves useless. During breakfast, a deputy comes to the house. When Paine removed his tracking device, a signal was sent to the police, so he’s now taken back to jail for two days to teach him a lesson.

When Noah goes to visit his father, Paine admits defeat. He says he isn’t going to pursue the dumping case and vows to be more responsible when he gets home. Noah says, “I left the jail with mixed-up feelings. I wanted things to be different at home, for Mom’s sake, but I sure didn’t want Dad to make himself into a whole different person. Yet maybe there was no other way” (136).

Later that day, Noah and Abbey go to Thunder Beach for a swim where they find Shelly sunbathing. They tell her about their latest adventure. Shelly says that one of the gamblers on the Coral Queen is a man named Billy Babcock, and he works for the Coast Guard. He’s been alerting Dusty to planned inspections in exchange for canceling his gambling debts. As the kids continue to chat with Shelly, Noah wades out in the gulf to retrieve a discarded beer can, only to realize he’s standing in human waste. A loggerhead turtle approaches, and Noah tries to scare it away from the muck before it’s harmed by the toxic water. While riding their bicycles back home, Noah confides to Abbey that he’s got a new plan to deal with Dusty, but their parents aren’t to know about it.

The next day, Paine goes in search of a new job. He’s hired by Tropical Rescue to man a 24-foot boat. His job is to tow tourists who run aground or run out of gas. Even though he complains about people who don’t know how to steer a boat, Paine is happy to be working on the water again. The relationship between Donna and Paine also smooths out now that he’s out of jail and bringing in a regular paycheck.

During this lull, Noah and Abbey hatch their secret plan. They go to visit Shelly, who is suffering from an early morning hangover. They tell her their scheme. She believes it’s crazy enough to work and says, “‘And all I gotta do is flush? […] That’s it?’ ‘That’s all you’ve got to do,’ I said. ‘Flush, and flush often’” (149).

As they bicycle back from Shelly’s trailer, Noah and Abbey are waylaid by Jasper and Bull. Abbey managed to latch onto Bull’s earlobe with her teeth. He begins to scream. Jasper threatens to break Noah’s neck if she doesn’t let go. An old man who looks like a pirate intervenes in the middle of the fray. Noah says:

The voice belonged to a lanky, long-armed man with woolly, silvery hair. A gleaming gold coin hung from a tarnished chain around his neck. His craggy face looked like a mahogany stump, and on one tanned cheek was a scar in the shape of an M (153).

The unknown man warns Jasper and Bull to leave Abbey and Noah alone, now and in the future. The two bullies are intimidated and release their captives. Without revealing his name, the pirate tells Abbey and Noah to leave while he has a chat with their attackers.

Later that afternoon, Noah and Abbey go out on the water with their parents. The family sits in a boat and watches the sunset over the gulf. They eagerly scan the horizon for the legendary green flash that appears just as the sun dips below the sea. Nobody has ever spotted the flash, but they all keep hoping to see it one day. With everybody together and temporarily happy, Noah thinks the evening ends perfectly.

The next day, Abbey and Noah pool their resources to buy fifty-seven dollars’ worth of food coloring at the grocery store. They will use thirty-four bottles of fuchsia dye for something they’ve dubbed “Operation Royal Flush.” Shelly has agreed to flush the dye down the toilets on the Coral Queen for them. On their way to her house, they’re intercepted by Bull. He’s come to apologize. Noah realizes that the old pirate frightened Bull and Jasper so badly that they’ve promised not to mess with Noah or Abbey ever again.

Once the siblings arrive at Shelly’s, she protests that it will take too long to squeeze the dye out of so many tubes, and she can’t be gone very long from her bartender post. Against her objections, Noah proposes to help Shelly by flushing dye in one bathroom while she takes the other. Back at home that evening, the kids learn that Mr. Shine has straightened out Paine’s legal mess and settled the case, though Paine will have to pay for the restoration expenses on the casino boat.

Now that domestic harmony has been restored, Donna tells Noah and Abbey that their parents are going out on the date the following night. This dovetails perfectly with the Royal Flush scheme. The siblings assure their parents that they’ll be in bed by eleven sharp. Noah says, “Neither of us could look Mom in the eye. It felt lousy lying to her, but honestly we had no choice. Not if we hoped to catch Dusty Muleman red-handed. Or fuchsia-handed, to be exact” (169).

After Donna and Paine leave for their date, Abbey and Noah immediately commandeer a dinghy and cruise over to Dusty’s marina. Abbey agrees to wait in the boat while Noah slips aboard the Coral Queen. Shelly hides him in one of the ladies’ rooms and puts an “Out of Order” sign on the door. Noah spends hours squeezing tubes of food dye down the toilets and flushing them.

When he finishes, Noah decides to make a run for it just as an elderly woman starts banging on the restroom door, demanding entry. He tries to block her path, but she rushes in, and Noah slips past her to escape. The woman starts yelling about a pervert in the bathroom as Noah rushes to the outer deck, pursued by two security guards. When they have him cornered near an upper deck railing, Noah decides to jump. He says, “The bouncers reached out and lunged, but I was already in the air, falling sweetly to freedom. Or so I told myself as I hollered, ‘Geronimo!’ (185)