40 pages • 1 hour read
Douglas Stone, Sheila Heen, Bruce PattonA modern alternative to SparkNotes and CliffsNotes, SuperSummary offers high-quality Study Guides with detailed chapter summaries and analysis of major themes, characters, and more.
The book springs from the work of the Harvard Negotiation Project, and focuses on how to negotiate within a difficult conversation. Negotiation is defined as a synthetic act of multiple parties who attempt to arrive at a conclusion or answer through interactive dialogue and conversation. Negotiation typically requires a series of back-and-forth exchanges where each party will state their side of the issue. Together their goal is to reach some kind of mutual understanding that everyone agrees upon.
The etymology of the English word perspective is taken from the Latin terms “per” and “species,” and when put together mean something similar to “the act of seeing through something.” In contemporary English, the use of the word “perspective” emphasizes an individual’s unique way of seeing something from a particular vantage point. It doesn’t mean that any other way of seeing something is necessarily false. Speaking about a perspective on something means to speak about how something appears from a particular point of view.
A person’s intention is the goal that they have in mind when speaking or acting. They intend something because they incline, or bend toward, a particular thing. Thus, when we speak about intention, we mean to speak about what one actually meant to do or say, and the effect that one wanted to have. This is distinct from the way one’s words or actions actually impacted their target.
Conflict is born out of clashing, opposing perspectives or intentions. Sometimes conflict is something that can be violent or defined by anger or resentment, but it need not be. There are plenty of times where conflict is defined simply by opposing viewpoints without resorting to violence, anger, or harsh words. Conflict is simply the intersection of ideas that do not immediately harmonize.
Taken from the Greek word “pathos,” which means “experience” or “suffering,” empathy is the act of putting oneself in another’s shoes and attempting to embody or experience what they are feeling or thinking. Empathy is absolutely crucial for the success of difficult conversations. It allows one to understand someone who is approaching a difficult topic or issue from a different perspective.