A Good Kind of Trouble

The girls ask Shayla why she doesn’t have any Black friends or sit with Black classmates at lunch, and she repeatedly responds that she’s had the same friends since elementary school, where there were only a few Black people in her grade. They insinuate that she doesn’t have Black friends because she thinks she’s better than a Black person. Stephanie tells her she’s “thinking [she’s] all that with [her] big ol’ forehead” (254). Shayla, who is already insecure about her forehead, gets angry and asks if they want to fight.

Shayla is ready to fight the relay girls, but Angie starts laughing. She says, “[T]hat’s a Black girl for you” (256), and Shayla starts laughing too when she imagines herself trying to take on all three of them. They run into Coach West as they leave the bathroom, who looks at them suspiciously. In shop class, Yolanda ignores Shayla, and Shayla ignores Tyler, though she wants to apologize to him. Shayla dreads track practice when the bell rings.

Track is bearable. When Angie practices hurdles near Shayla, Shayla gives her a meaningful look, trying to wordlessly convey her feelings on friendship and on their exchange earlier. Shayla notices that Coach West is distressed by something on her phone but doesn’t want to talk about it. Momma is also upset when she picks Shayla up, and Shayla learns that the police officer was acquitted of shooting the Black man. Shayla feels close to tears. They pass a group of protesters, and Shayla wants Momma to honk in support of one of their signs, but Momma refuses. At home, Shayla can tell Hana has been crying as she was talking to Daddy before they walked in. Regina picks Hana up in her car, and Daddy warns Hana to “be careful. Don’t do anything stupid” (262).

When Hana isn’t at dinner, Shayla is concerned. Her parents inform her Hana is at a protest, marching down the 405 freeway. They bow their heads for grace, and Momma prays for Hana and the families who have lost Black men to police violence. Shayla asks if she can join Hana at the march, but Momma says no. Shayla asks if it’s illegal, and Daddy explains that “sometimes you have to do something that’s wrong in some people’s eyes but is morally right” (266). On the TV, they see the police face off against the protesters. Shayla worries for the protesters. The police deploy tear gas, and the protesters leave the freeway, which is a relief to Shayla. Momma sends her to bed.

Shayla wakes up Hana in the morning, eager to see if she’s okay and to hear about the protest. She looks around at the various Black heroes posted on Hana’s wall and listens to Hana talk about how she wants to “wake folks up” (269). This inspires her to ask for an armband. She wears it, both proud and anxious.

Bernard immediately brings attention to Shayla’s armband in science class, sparking several comments about the trial. One boy expresses support for the verdict, but Bernard shuts him down with a look. Alex asks about the armband in history class, where Mr. Powell makes a statement on protests and change being difficult and lengthy. At break, Shayla talks to Julia and Isabella about the armband. When Julia implies that Shayla isn’t Black enough to wear the armband, Shayla retorts that she’s Black regardless of her behavior, and she asks Julia how she would feel if someone said something similar about being Asian American. Julia and Isabella express the assumptions others have about them based on their race. They agree that Julia shouldn’t have said something like that, and they reconcile. At PE, Shayla stashes the armband in her locker since it’s not a part of her uniform, but she wishes she had it on when she sees Yolanda. Shayla is beginning to crave a friend who can relate to her on being Black. Though Yolanda doesn’t seem happy to see her, Shayla greets her enthusiastically and invites her to her house. Yolanda is noncommittal and doesn’t pick Shayla to be a part of her team.

In English, Shayla learns they will be reading To Kill a Mockingbird and asks if they can read Brown Girl Dreaming instead, a book by an author of color. Ms. Jacobs frowns, and someone laughs. At lunch, Shayla wants to stand up on the table and yell about Black Lives Matter, but instead, she twirls her armband. Isabella asks for an armband, too, which starts a discussion between the three of them about whether a person must be Black to support Black Lives Matter. Shayla tells Isabella she will bring her an armband tomorrow but wonders if it will cause trouble.

In shop class, Shayla explains the situation with Tyler to Yolanda. Yolanda asks if Shayla would bring her an armband, too. Another student calls out that “[b]lue lives matter,” and Shayla responds, “Of course blue lives matter, stupid” (282). She leaves her armband on for PE, and Coach West allows it. Angie points it out as they run their warm-up, then runs with Shayla the remainder of the mile. 

Shayla brings Isabella and Julia both armbands, but Julia doesn’t take hers. She thinks it’s useless and that it’s only for Black people. Shayla tries not to care but doesn’t understand. Yolanda smiles at Shayla for the first time in a while when she ties hers on. There are matching black ribbons in her hair. 

On her way to English, Shayla notices a group of boys, including Bernard, clustered around Alex. Though Shayla thinks Bernard will hurt Alex, he instead shoves another boy to defend him. Principal Trask sees the shove and gets only Bernard in trouble. Shayla stops Principal Trask from taking Bernard to her office, explaining what really happened. Principal Trask doesn’t believe her, and instead she asks Bernard to remove the black sock he has tied around his arm. Bernard refuses, to Principal Trask’s outrage. Coach West arrives, backing up Shayla’s story but gently encouraging Bernard to remove the armband. He clumsily removes it. Principal Trask admonishes him for fighting, but Coach West intervenes, ensuring everyone involved, not just Bernard, goes to the office. Later, Julia doesn’t believe that Bernard was protecting Alex when Shayla tells the story at lunch. Isabella doesn’t believe that Principal Trask made him remove the black sock. Shayla feels completely unheard.

Shayla gives Tyler Julia’s armband in shop class. She’s in a bad mood at track practice, even though Angie distributes armbands to the relay girls. When Momma picks her up after school, she asks how Shayla’s feeling about wearing the armband. Shayla reflects for a moment and responds that she doesn’t know. When Momma asks if she’ll keep wearing it, Shayla decides she wants to continue so that she can make a statement, however small. At home, she writes and writes in her eyeball journal because she feels as if she can’t talk to anyone else about her experiences.

Daddy comes to Shayla’s room with dinner. They talk about the armband, and he tells her how proud he is of her for standing up for something. She asks why he thinks the verdict was not guilty, and he tells her that “life isn’t fair” and that “sometimes, it sure seems like Black folks get way too big of a helping of that unfair pie” (191). Shayla tearfully states that “[e]veryone hates us” (300), and Daddy pulls her in for a hug.

That weekend, there is another protest outside of the police officer’s house, and one of Hana’s friends is arrested. Monday, Shayla gives Bernard an armband, and he thanks her for standing up for him and hugs her. After history class, Mr. Powell warns her that some people may react negatively to her armband. When she gets to the United Nations break spot, Shayla notices Isabella is wearing her armband. Isabella talks excitedly about getting a new kitten, and neither of them mentions Julia’s absence. At lunch, Shayla finds Julia sitting with her other group of friends. At the end of lunch, when Julia asks for armbands for “all [her] friends” (196), the wording offends Shayla. She tells Julia she doesn’t have enough fabric, and Isabella suggests they make the armbands themselves. Shayla admonishes her for treating it like recreation. 

Shayla slams her locker to see Principal Trask looking disapprovingly at her armband. Shayla worries about getting in trouble, but Principal Trask only warns her to get to class. 

In shop class, Principal Trask announces over the speaker system that “the wearing of armbands is against school-policy dress code” and warns of “disciplinary action” (311). Yolanda and Shayla keep theirs on even when another classmate orders them to remove them.